overnight grownup
Saturday, Jun. 16, 2012   12:53 pm

i have to write here more often. i have this character trait? of wanting to tell any/everybody any/everything about any/everything...but really..no one cares..i realize that..so, ill tell myself more..

im going to new york. any minute now..well, not any minute, but figuratively. my bags are packed, my apartment is deposited..i just have no way to get there and no clue when i will have a way. but i am ready to go now!

soo..im kinda thinking to go anywhere and figure it out. maybe denver. maybe california. i just want to go. i want to be gone.

not just because of john, but hes not helping. i am sick of talking about stuff and doing nothing. talk, talk, talk, talk...all i do.

its strange. i think im growing up more and more by the day. is that possible? or maybe living with a childmanbaby brings out the adult in me? but im ready to be an adult. i CANNOT believe those words just came from me!! the eternal teenager. 16 fo life! was my motto...now its just a memory. and im not as heartbroken as i thought id be about it. crazy!

whats happened?? life, i suppose. hardens you.

so, im not sure where im going but i think ill find peace wherever i find myself. i cant wait. i need some peace and distance and time and space to get to know myself.