happy new year!
Tuesday, Jan. 04, 2011   11:22 pm

two entries ago i alluded to moving to new york in six months...

i doubt that will be happening in the next one month. the last five have been a complete curveball.

livin on my own. im doin it. im more grown up thsn evvver. and im more scared than ever. or almost ever. ive been pretty afraid of life before.

but im excited. glad for it. hopeful and optimistic. what else can one do. i wasnt ready for change but who ever actually really is prepared for the impact of change? there is no being ready for the swift second in which lifes path veers off to where you werent looking. idk what im saying. ive missed keeping these diaries.

i do hope to keep them up. i need someone to talk to and sometimes...a lot of times...im the best one for the job.

ill be 25 in a month. apprehensive. dont know why. yes i do. i feel im losing something. that ive been trying not to let go of for a long time. a security blanket. a binky. an old pair of jeans. a scratched up cd. youth.

not now. maybe tomorrow. if the weathers right ill snuggle up inside or outside of starbucks..unless it costs? hmmm...