all mixed up
Thursday, Nov. 02, 2006   1:14 pm

i think im really sad right now. i dont like it. so much shit it fucked. and im just sitting in it.

me and my mom: raging fight in the car the other. maybe not raging compared to knives and bruises-but for us. i was screaming at the top of my lungs. she stopped the car and i got out and went home. now, i hate her. i dont want to talk to her. she called me ungrateful. fuck that! does she know im fighting addiction right now? does she understand how much i fight to ask her for nothing? i stay away from home so she doesnt have to buy me food. i dont know. this isnt coming out too articulate or particularly sense-making, but i dont care.

im lost. im scared. im lonely. im tired. im starving. im broke. im feening. im tired. im sad.

i might be pregnant.

and, as usual, i just dont know what to do.