josiah
Wednesday, Mar. 20, 2002   7:50 am

i hate this computer. the time is set all wrong and i have to put in the write one every time i start an entry!!! um, yeah.

my life has been way too busy lately. its horrible! i have no time for anything. and when i do have time all i want to do is fucking sleep! my life is sooo boring! all of my friggin entries are so boring!

me and adelaine will prolly never be friends again like we were. its totally over. i don't really have time to hang out with her very much anymore, and when i do have time, i would much rather hang out with somebody else. i keep telling myself, just 3 more months, just 3 more months. but those months could not pass fast enough! just grin and bear it, i guess.

paige's brother likes me i think. in science yesterday he like had his arm around, and was like rubbing me. he was laying on my shoulder, and then he started kissing my neck. i didn't stop him though (is that good or bad?) and he started feeling up on me, ever so slightly. i didn't stop that either. then he turned to me and said "if i told you i wanted to kiss you right now, would you let me?". my almost immediate answer was "probably". then he tried to kiss me! i was incredibly shocked because we were in the middle of science class. we were not alone in the movies, or a car. we were surrounded by like 30 other people in a classroom. so i was like "not now you crazy motherfucker!!". it was the only thing i could say. my heart was racing, and my stomach was so very tied up in so many tight little knots. it was so wierd. this is paige's older brother. i have know paige for 4 years and his brother for a couple of months. i didn't even know that harold was in my class for the whole year. i thought he came in during like 2nd quarter or something. i wonder if he told paige though? would he? are they even close? i really don't know. how would paige react? i have heard a lot over the years that he likes me. even harold told me that! it really isn't a very complicated situation though. i just make it seem like some tangled little web. i wanted to kiss harold so bad. not because i like him though, but because the last time i kissed anyone was on november 4th and i really need some! thats sad, but true.

more about guys now. another h. but i work with this one. he's really cute, and funny, and smart, although a lot of people don't think he is. maybe he isn't book smart-although he prolly is-but he is intelligent. which i think is way more important. who cares if somebody can name all of the state capitals in alphabetical order, as long as they can hold up a conversation for more than 3 1/2 seconds. really hope he likes me, he seems to flirt just as much i do, so maybe thats a good sign? i hope he's working today. as upset as i am that karla left, i am kinda happy, cuz now i don't feel like i have competition. i dont expect to go out with hector, but i don't like competing for his attention. i'll prolly come write more later, but for now, ive said too much-but i havent said it all